| FUNKY FIRE HALL CHILLI I was asked to put a team together for the 5 th Annual Provincial Chilli Cook-off - a benefit for the Manitoba Firefighters Burn Fund. I was only happy to oblige and contacted my good friend/fellow fire chef/ringer Gale Osterman to see if she'd help out. Truth be known, I needed a support group. Thankfully she agreed.  Since the rules required us to wear hats and aprons we thought that chef hats would fill the bill as our team was dubbed, ‘Fire Hall Chefs.' After much phoning around I located fire truck red hats to match our aprons. “The hats are one size fits all,” the salesman told me over the phone. “They have Velcro on the back so they are adjustable from big heads to little heads.”
“Well that's good, because I've got a fat one!” I replied with a laugh. I set sail for the Happy Cooker and snagged our chapeaus. When I got home I discovered that one size fits all doesn't apply to my colossal cranium as the Velcro refused to reach. Seriously, we had to bobby and safety pin the hat together and hope that I didn't have to do too much thinking, causing my head to swell and my hat to fly off and seriously maim someone. But I digress. We decided to make the ‘Funky Fire Hall Chilli' from ‘Fire Hall Cooking.' I made a test batch for the guys at #1 station, and as Gale works at a cross-town hall, I dropped a sampler off to her on my way home to get her opinion. “It's really good Jeff,” she reported. “But to be honest, I think I'd like it with a little more heat.” You'll find that ‘Funky Fire Hall Chilli' is quite mild as firefighter chillis go, with a sweet and sour twist that really makes it unique. Personally, I'm of the opinion that if you make your chilli mild to medium you'll likely please everyone. Crewmates or friends who prefer to peel the lining off the roof of their mouths can always add hot sauce as a condiment. On game day Gale and I descended upon the Forks Market in Winnipeg with the loan goal of having fun, which we certainly did. We made the chilli as per the recipe below, plus a couple of tweaks. We added garlic to the original recipe (noted below) plus my standard sauté formula of a little Kosher salt and fresh ground pepper to both the beef and the veggies as they fried to boost flavours. As I love Italian seasoning, we also added 2 teaspoons of the spice blend to the veggies as they cooked. About an hour into the simmer it was up to Gale to taste test. “More fire Jeff!” she suggested. Since we could always add more later, we started with ½ teaspoon of cayenne. We let it brew for another half an hour – keep in mind that as moisture is released from the simmering chilli the flavours concentrate - re-tasted, and chose to add another ¼ teaspoon of cayenne. A total of ¾ teaspoon of cayenne was just right for us, but of course you can put in as many alarms as you think you can handle when you make your batch. So here it is, our winning formula for Funky Fire Hall Chilli. With the first place trophy in hand, you can only imagine how fat my head is now! HMMM, WHAT DO I NEED HERE? • 2 pounds lean ground beef
• 1 each jumbo onion and red pepper - coarsely chopped
• 3–4 stalks celery – diced
• 4 cloves garlic – run through the press
• 1 28-ounce tin diced tomatoes
• ½ cup white vinegar
• 3 tablespoons fancy molasses
• 3 tablespoons brown sugar
• 2 tablespoons chili powder
• 2 teaspoons cumin
• ½ tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
• 1 19-ounce tin kidney beans - washed and drained
• 1 28-ounce tin brown beans – we used Libby's
• 150 grams (1/3 rd pound) mushrooms - coarsely sliced
• ½ 5.5-ounce tin tomato paste – optional but recommended
 OH, WHAT TO DO, WHAT TO DO?
• Brown up the ground beef and drain the fat. Set aside.
• Fire up a Dutch oven or large soup pot and stir-fry the onions, celery, peppers and garlic in a couple tablespoons of olive oil till slightly softened.
• Combine the tomatoes, vinegar, molasses, brown sugar, chili powder, cumin and Worcestershire sauce. Pour the lot in with the veggies and bring to a slow boil.
• Toss in the browned beef, beans and mushrooms. Reduce to a simmer, and cook uncovered for about 2 hours, giving it an occasional stir.
• Time for a taste test. Add brown sugar if it's too spicy; add chili powder or cayenne if it's too sweet or not spicy enough. If the sauce is too thin for your liking, simply add the tomato paste to thicken it. We did.
• To dress the Funky Fire-Hall Chili up (just like in the picture) rim the inside of each serving bowl with taco chips and garnish with grated nacho cheese and chopped green onions or fresh cilantro.
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